Category Archives: animals

News from the lab

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Life is so much more interesting with breaking news from the scientific community.

In no other arena is it more clearly demonstrated that the more we know, the more we don’t know.

Each new discovery is greeted with a barrage of new questions and, in this house anyway, we love to play along.

So here are this week’s announcements…

And the questions they inspired…

 

Announcement:

Scientist claim to be about 2 years away from creating a Wooly Mammoth embryo.

What we want to know:

Disregarding the obvious questions of: Is this a good idea? What are their plans for said embryo? And, how many lawyers and politicians will get involved? We are wondering:

1.What is the real reason Wooly Mammoths went extinct? Was it because they were slow? Or because they were delicious?

2. How many humans could be sheltered and clothed by one Mammoth hide?

And, bearing the above in mind:

3. Is it possible that the phrase “it takes a village” originated 10000 years ago as “it takes a Wooly Mammoth”?

 

Announcement:

The discovery of a star system with 3 planets in the potentially life sustaining Goldilocks zone.

What we want to know:  

First, if you haven’t already moved past the question of “is there life?” then you do not watch enough sci-fi. Of course there is. What kind of fun would it be if there wasn’t? Questions from the serious geek are:

1.Who is the advanced species? Us discovering them or them apparently choosing to ignore us?

2.Is anyone truly comfortable with either possibility?

3.What are the probabilities that any of the planets are sustaining Wooly Mammoths?

 

Announcement:

The Large Hadron Collider has proven there are no such things as ghosts.

What we want to know:

1.What?

2.How is it scientists can confidently say and do these things but they still don’t know how gravity works or what makes an airplane fly?

And finally:

3.What does the LHC have to say about Wooly Mammoth populations in the Trappist-1 star system?

 

Inquiring minds are waiting. 

 

 

 

Talk to the animals

TALK TO THE ANIMALS

Prepare yourself. This one isn’t all that funny. 

Hey Wait! Come back!

It happens. Sometimes my week isn’t filled with ROTFL adventures. Sometimes it just, well, nice. Nice can be fun too.

Alright, if I promise to stuff this post with adorable animal clips will you stay?

Great. Now that I have your attention…

My son is convinced he can make any animal love him. He’s devoted countless hours to that endeavor while his parents (aside from a firm foot down that he will NOT love bears) have watched.

(Safe and friendly animals)

Why not? It’s fun and he hasn’t been injured yet, not seriously anyway.

(These were biters) 

But the truth is that outside of dogs and the occasional marine mammal, I’m not convinced animals are capable of loving humans. Animals, I believe, simply recognize positive feelings as windows of opportunity. 

They’re using us for food.

(Come to think of it, I’m using them for the same thing…)

Deep down I think everyone believes this. We’re just too busy happily anthropomorphizing to care. It’s far more fun to think that fox is staring because he recognizes in you a kindred spirit than because he’s waiting to see if you have cookies.

This is precisely why birdfeeders are so popular. I know. I have one. Blissfully I watch it drained of seed then trod off to the store for more and fill it again. Repeat (poor starving babies) until I’m broke.

(My dalliances with socialism begin and end with that feeder.)

But anyway, back to Mr. Doolittle (he’s not a Dr. yet. He’s only 12). Recently he learned that if you love (properly deal with) a European Robin it will eat right out of your hand!

And Doolittle hasn’t loved (trained) a wild bird since…

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Oh right. But that was like a year ago and a totally different bird…So…

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This is yesterday. Here he is, patiently showing a robin what good a friends they could be if the little bird would just trust.

He could stay like that for hours. In fact he did. It took hot IKEA meatballs to lure in inside again. And he’s at it again today.

Batten down the hatches little bird. A love storm is coming.

You will eat like kings.